045: Cupid (Cupidity Resident) sits on my deck

I was at a hot new club the other night, The Vault -- my post about it is here, and here's a SLURL if you're not doing anything next Monday 7-9 SLT. I thought their idea of barring gestures was such a good one that I had to find out more about the people who came up with it, so I asked DJ Cupid for an interview and he said yes.  Here's the result!

By the way, I figured if I was going to interview people on my deck I'd better get some decent furniture with some decent poses -- this is the result. Still testing it out, but so far so good.

[21:05] Rusty Redfield: *click*

[21:05] Rusty Redfield: Okay! I'm here with Cupid -- Cupidity Resident, right? -- who has kindly agreed to sit on my deck and be interviewed, thanks Cupid

[21:05] Cupid (cupidity): My pleasure, Rusty

[21:06] Rusty Redfield: We found out the other night that we're both from British Columbia, in Canada -- but about four hours' drive apart, this is a big country here! LOL

[21:07] Cupid (cupidity): LOL It's a small world sometimes. I meet people from Canada all the time, but rarely my corner of it.

[21:07] Rusty Redfield: Nobody from my rural corner, that's for sure!

[21:07] Rusty Redfield: Anyway -- if I may get teh ball rolling ...

[21:07] Rusty Redfield: 1. Why do you stay in Second Life?  What keeps you here?

[21:09] Cupid (cupidity): The people keep me here, mainly. To be honest, I came from another social media platform called Red Light Center. From there, a group of my closest friends decided to check out Second Life, We never looked back. I have met many people since then and have grown my social circle. I like SL and all it has to offer, but it doesn't mean much if you don't have connections and the ability to make new ones.

[21:09] Rusty Redfield: I've heard of Red Light, never been there -- it's all about the sex, right?

[21:11] Cupid (cupidity): It can be it you choose to take it there, which a lot of people do and I certainly did, but just like here, having sex all the time gets old. In the end, it's about friends and true connections to people.

[21:11] Rusty Redfield: I couldn't agree more

[21:11] Rusty Redfield: and that's actually a brilliant segue to question 2 LOL

[21:11] Rusty Redfield: 2. What are the qualities that attract you to people in Second Life?

[21:13] Cupid (cupidity): The main qualities I guess would be different for everyone, but for me one of the best qualities people I like to hang out with to have is the commitment to have fun and staying positive. We all know that drama happens and sometimes it's necessary and unavoidable, but I gravitate towards people who accept who they are, acknowledge their mistakes, and move on quickly.

[21:14] Rusty Redfield: I really like the way you put that

[21:14] Rusty Redfield: Yes, drama occasionally happens ... let's get it over with and put it behind us

[21:15] Cupid (cupidity): Absolutely. Honestly, and kind of bluntly, if you're not having fun here, then you're doing something wrong. And that onus is on you.

[21:15] Rusty Redfield: yep

[21:15] Rusty Redfield: I don't hang out with people who aren't happy unless they aren't happy

[21:16] Rusty Redfield: Well, now question 3 is where I give you the opportunity to do some promotion LOL -- go ahead, toot your horn, everybody does and it's why I set up these interviews

[21:16] Rusty Redfield: 3. What are you working on, as a form of artistic expression or in order to earn money, or both?

[21:19] Cupid (cupidity): There's both a public and a private artistic expression for me. My public expression is as a DJ. People hear my voice and my choice in music, which can be deeply personal. I truly feel that people's taste in music reflect a lot about their personalities. Granted, there a lot of songs that I love that I would never DJ, but all the ones I do I genuinely love. Maybe not all the requests, but the ones I put in my playlist I've screened, listened to, and personally enjoyed.

[21:19] Rusty Redfield: I know you DJ at the Vault, that's where we met -- I blogged about it a few days ago. Are you DJing anywhere else?

[21:20] Rusty Redfield: LOL I just got this new furniture -- I see you're having fun with it!! LOL

[21:21] Cupid (cupidity): LOL :) Yeah. I guess I can't sit still for long. I like trying out different positions on furniture.. and I guess you can interpret that anyway you want:)

[21:21] Rusty Redfield: ROFL

[21:21] Rusty Redfield: THAT's what keeps us in SL

[21:22] Rusty Redfield: I want to hear more about the Vault -- I'm wondering where the idea came from to not allow gestures, which I think is a fantastic idea

[21:25] Cupid (cupidity): The other owners, Miss Peaches and Russ Callahan, and I have been talking about it since before SL. Peaches taught me how to DJ and we both helped Russ out when he was interested. It's been a dream of ours to just open a club where we could hang out with our friends. A place where people can go when they just want to talk and hang out, where there happens to be music playing. We looked and had trouble finding anything else in SL with that same philosophy. I'm sure there are some. SL is a big place, but all the places we knew of had sploders and contests and those trivia balls

[21:25] Cupid (cupidity): We put a lot of thought into that and debated whether we wanted any of that

[21:26] Cupid (cupidity): Then we got to talking about what pissed us off most in a club. In the end, it game down to gesture

[21:26] Rusty Redfield: I admit to a certain fondness for trivia balls, but what I really like -- and what I come here to do -- is talk to other people

[21:26] Rusty Redfield: and you KNOW how I feel about gestures ROFL

[21:27] Rusty Redfield: so I think you guys are definitely on the right track and I hope people find out about it, because I think they'll agree with us

[21:27] Cupid (cupidity): LOL. We totally get it. I don't mind the trivia ball either, but if we do decide to play a game, we have actually just do it ourselves. Peaches is great at that actually.

[21:28] Rusty Redfield: Well, I think it's fantastic and I hope you expand to more nights than Monday.

[21:28] Rusty Redfield: Okay -- on to #4 ...

[21:28] Rusty Redfield: 4. If you could give advice to your earlier self in the first month that you spent in Second Life, what would you say?

[21:28] Cupid (cupidity): Let me just say this about gestures first, we understand that some people use them as communication and forms of expression, but... not us. We want to hear real words that people took the means to type than premade jabber.

[21:29] Rusty Redfield: absolutely!!

[21:29] Rusty Redfield: and, readers, here's a hint -- if you want to talk with someone, telling them they look good is a nice way to break the ice

[21:29] Cupid (cupidity): Flattery never hurts. Ever.

[21:29] Rusty Redfield: there isn't an av on the grid who can resist answering "Who made your hair?" ROFL

[21:30] Cupid (cupidity): LOL People tend to be fond of their shoes as well

[21:30] Rusty Redfield: I know!!

[21:30] Cupid (cupidity): Hee hee :)

[21:30] Rusty Redfield: <grin>

[21:30] Rusty Redfield: I like yours BTW ROFL

[21:30] Rusty Redfield: old fashioned shitkickers

[21:30] Cupid (cupidity): Aww.. you are a peach. I love your hair!

[21:31] Rusty Redfield: LOL just developed a receding hairline

[21:31] Rusty Redfield: anyway -- sorry, mutual admiration society for a minute there ROFL --

[21:31] Rusty Redfield: 4. If you could give advice to your earlier self in the first month that you spent in Second Life, what would you say?

[21:32] Cupid (cupidity): I would probably say take your time, don't spend money on anything unless you absolutely love it as first sight, and for god's sake organize your damn inventory as you buy stuff.

[21:32] Rusty Redfield: hah!! perfect!!

[21:32] Rusty Redfield: yeah, I can't tell you how much money I wasted in my first six months

[21:33] Rusty Redfield: and this is something nobody has said so far -- so my newbie readers thank you!

[21:33] Rusty Redfield: almost done

[21:33] Rusty Redfield: 5. What do you like most about the way that your avatar looks?

[21:35] Cupid (cupidity): To be honest, he's 100% custom made and tailored to fit what I think is attractive. He's not a cookie cutter and I needed that most of all. I change the look up now and then but not the skin itself.

[21:35] Cupid (cupidity): I think everyone should model their avatar after what they think is attractive, not what they think SHOULD be attractive

[21:36] Rusty Redfield: I think you're wise, when you find something that suits you, keep it

[21:36] Rusty Redfield: <grin> very true.  I tell people that perfection is the base state here -- it's the easy way out.  Looking imperfect is way more difficult and attractive.

[21:37] Rusty Redfield: and looking like an individual is the hardest thing of all.

[21:37] Cupid (cupidity): Agreed, plus you can't please everyone, so having an avatar your like and are proud of at least pleases you, which is kinda the main goal.

[21:37] Rusty Redfield: exactly

[21:37] Rusty Redfield: very true, you can't please everyone.

[21:38] Rusty Redfield: okay one last question

[21:38] Cupid (cupidity): Shoot :)

[21:38] Rusty Redfield: I added this one because I wanted suggestions on cool places to go! LOL

[21:38] Rusty Redfield: 6. What’s your favourite place to spend time in Second Life?

[21:39] Cupid (cupidity): It's not necessarily a where, but a with who. Russ and Peaches both brought this point up and I agree, in that we don't care if we don't get numbers into the Vault, so long as we're having a good time and everyone shows up does as well.

[21:40] Rusty Redfield: there you go.  So it's where your friends are?

[21:40] Cupid (cupidity): I could be sandbox with anyone, and have fun. It's all about the people you hang with

[21:40] Rusty Redfield: yep yep

[21:40] Rusty Redfield: there's tons of great things to do here but it's much more fun doing them with someone you like spending time with

[21:41] Cupid (cupidity): But I like to mix the activities up as well. Sometimes I want to dance, sometimes I want to play Greedy or other games. But none of that makes a difference if you're not hanging out with people you trust and care about

[21:41] Rusty Redfield: we're at the end -- but I always offer a chance for people to say anything they want.  Maybe philosophy of Second Life, or advice to newbies, or ... whatever.  Anything I forgot to ask but should have?

[21:44] Cupid (cupidity): We covered a lot of ground. I would just say that this is your second life, not your first. This is a place where we could have anything, do anything, and meet anyone. There are so much possibilities here, so... explore them. Create them. Find what works for you and doesn't. Fine people you connect with and keep them. And never rely on anyone else for your own fun. That's your own responsibility. All we can do is share it with others.

[21:44] Rusty Redfield: Very well put!! Thanks so much for your time Cupid -- I know we'll see each other again.

[21:44] Cupid (cupidity): I hope so, It's been a pleasure :)

[21:45] Cupid (cupidity): Thank you, Rusty
[21:45] Rusty Redfield: I'll just shut off the recorder *click*